Negative Ghost Rider, Your Account Has Expired!

What a way to start a week. I have spent the majority of today wondering why I got out of bed, especially when I have had no access to my work.

Mondays and I have never seen eye to eye – I loathe climbing out of bed most mornings, and I find it especially difficult to get myself motivated on Monday mornings.

Without fail, I will sleep in by miles after hitting the "off" button instead of "snooze" by mistake. The morning rituals that usually take 20 minutes must now be completed in just under 5 in order to catch the intended bus.

Without fail, I will let myself back into my apartment with the spare key hidden in my purse to retrieve my mobile phone / main house keys / security pass for work / head after racing out the self locking front door.

Without fail, one out of the two and a half working lifts in my building will be out of commission on Monday mornings. It’s not unusual to wait 5 minutes for a lift to arrive on my floor, filled to the brim with residents also leaving for work / school / life.

Without fail, the bus stop will be packed with over-excited and excitable school children, who consistently irk me with their high pitched and excessively loud chatter as they meander towards their schools. These are the same school children who consistently refuse to move out my way as I dash towards my bus screaming "wait for me" as it pulls away from the bus stop. These are the same school children who refuse to alight the designated school buses and instead chock up the regular services so that paying passengers are stranded at the bus stop until the next bus deigns to appear. These are also the same school children who consistently refuse to relinquish seats on buses to paying passengers, and who consistently refuse to apologise after they’ve stomped on your toes / feet / shin as they blindly climb over everyone else to get off the bus.

And without fail, the bus I intend to catch on Monday mornings will be 30 minutes late, leaving me barely enough time to dump my bag at my desk before my weekly Monday morning meeting begins.

Today was no exception. I slept in, had a 2-minute shower (where I also brushed my teeth), was dressed in 2 minutes, and gave my oesophagus 3rd degree burns as I sculled my boiling hot coffee. In the 5 minutes between pressing the "down" button for the lift and the lift actually arriving, I let myself back into my apartment – twice – to pick up my mobile phone (1st time) and my main house keys (2nd time). By the time I arrived at the bus stop, it was teeming with an impenetrable sea of yapping school kids. The only unexpected twist of fate involved the bus – today, it was 40 minutes late.

After the Friday that wasn’t (last Friday is another story all together), I knew I had buckets of work awaiting my attention. I’d successfully missed my meeting (which was cancelled – thanks for letting me know!) and thought my day could only get better now that I was at work, relatively awake and willing to get on with work.

No such luck. My good mood vanished into thin air when I tried to log on to my computer, only to be greeted by a chirpy little message: "Your account has expired. Please contact your administrator."

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

The above message is worse than the Blue Screen of Death. The Blue Screen of Death means you get a new computer to play with. The "account expired" message means I am without access to any of my work and emails for at least 2 days, no matter how many new computers they see fit to give me. And when you are a consultant based in your client’s office, it’s very hard (if not impossible) to try and justify twiddling your thumbs at your desk for 2 whole days.

And the above message is a "consultant special" – as a non-permanent employee, I was set up with a temporary account that expires every 6 months without warning. There are pros and cons with this process, and today was one of those cons. I understand why temporary accounts are set up that way, but I really wish I was warned some time last week, so as to avoid the painful day that was today.

To pass the time, I have:

* Gone to the mail room twice – time is chargeable when seen carrying mail to and from the mail room.
* Talked to everyone on my floor twice – time is chargeable when seen with notebook and pen in hand.
* Had a 2-hour lunch break – time is chargeable when seen looking at one’s monitor at one’s desk.
* Gone to the Express Post mail box – time is chargeable when seen carrying mail to the Express Post box.
* Fixed the photocopier 5 times (the number of times it has broken down today due to incompetent people incorrectly refilling the paper) – time is chargeable, especially when the alternative was the machine being out of commission for the rest of the week as we waited for a Canon technician to arrive.

I have also called the "staff support line" every hour, on the hour, to check whether the request to reactivate my account has been actioned. Thus far, no action has been taken but my request was "escalated" a little further every time I called.

I hold no hope of being able to access my work and emails until Wednesday at the earliest. I was told at 10.30am that my request form should be actioned by 2pm, even though there was a huge pile of backlogged requests from last Thursday. Yes, they were still working on stuff from last week. So with no action by 4pm, I was told it may be midday tomorrow before I have access again, but rest assured that my request has been "escalated" again.

Grrr … painful, painful start to the week. Methinks declaring tomorrow a mental health day is in order.

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2 responses to “Negative Ghost Rider, Your Account Has Expired!

  1. If you had mental health dayed today you could have come to the movies with me!

  2. dude. seriously- cheer up charlie!!! im actually a little freaked… i have a photo up on this profile? its soooo old? crap. i dont even know half the things i post on the internet!Anyhooo…. just remember…. your friendly BCS buddy is here to cheer you up!!! hey… at least you dont have psycho woman dictating your every move…. \’is the stationary done yet?\’… \’ it is very important\’… YEAH WHATEVER!!!!

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