Let me kick start this blog by stating clearly that I am not a Paris Hilton fan. I literally shudder at any "news" generated by this insipid and annoying little twat whose claim to fame is a big mouth and a deep throat. But I couldn’t help but be infuriated by her latest exploits involving a suspended licence, her "ill-informed people" and a long-overdue wake-up call.
For those of you equally uninterested in the life of this banal and repugnant tartlet, here’s a recap. On May 4, Hilton was sentenced to 45 days in jail for violating conditions of her probation stemming from her DUI charge in September last year. Below is my understanding of the sequence of events:
Sept 7: Caught DUI (driving whilst under the influence of alcohol / drugs / controlled substances) and recorded a blood alcohol reading of more than 0.08
Sept 26: Charged with DUI
Nov 30: Drivers licence suspended until March 29
Jan 15: Caught driving on suspended licence, received both verbal and written warning from California Highway Patrol that she was driving without a valid licence, signed the warning verifying her licence was indeed suspended
Jan 22: Pleaded no contest to alcohol-related reckless driving, received a suspended sentenced and put on probation for 36 months, ordered to enrol in and successfully complete an alcohol education program by Feb 12, ordered to pay fines of $1,500, ordered to not drive a motor vehicle without a valid driver’s licence and ordered to obey all laws and all orders of the Court
Feb 12: Failed to meet deadline to enrol in alcohol education program
Feb 27: Caught driving (again) on suspended licence
Mar 29: Court found Hilton in violation of her terms of probation
May 4: Sentenced to 45 days in jail
May 6: Fired her long time rep / scapegoat for misinforming Hilton regarding her licence suspension
May 7: Filed appeal to her sentence, rehired long time rep / scapegoat, started online petition to California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger for a pardon
Jun 5: Deadline to report to jail – do not pass Go, do not collect $200
So little regard has this little miss for anyone else but herself that she even arrived to the court hearing on May 4 late. Yes, folks, that’s right – she kept a full court of people waiting – not a good start to your case, is it?
Here’s what else I found out today:
* If Hilton fails to report to jail on June 5, she will have to serve a 90-day jail sentence, which is the maximum jail term for her probation violation.
* The Court-ordered alcohol education program that Hilton was to enrol in and complete is a 12-hour course.
* At the time of pleading no contest to her DUI charge, the Court made an offer to Hilton to complete 40 hours of community service in exchange for reducing her probation period by 12 months. Hilton declined.
By a cruel twist, Hilton’s licence was reinstated by the good people at the US Department of Motor Vehicles on March 29, which meant the outrage I felt when I saw a photo dated May 9 of Hilton driving her beloved car is now unwarranted and unfounded.
The judge who handed down the sentence to Hilton deserves a Nobel Prize. Los Angeles Superior Court Judge Michael T Sauer proved to be a no-nonsense straight shooter who was fed up with Hilton repeatedly flouting the law and thumbing her nose at the authorities. I applaud the fact that he was unfazed by Hilton’s so-called star power and handed down the sentence sought by the prosecution.
Hilton’s defence throughout her case was that she didn’t know she did anything wrong and / or she didn’t know because her people didn’t tell her. Yet there was clear evidence that she knew she was driving without a valid licence – Hilton was warned verbally and in writing when she was pulled over by a highway patrol cop in January that she was doing the wrong thing by driving whilst her licence was suspended – heck, she even signed the damn warning and kept a copy of it in her glove box.
What a life, to have people do everything for you, to have people to blame when you cock up. "My people didn’t tell me" and "I just sign what they ask me to sign" are not plausible defences in life. Pleading ignorance will not avoid jail time. Who did Hilton think the judge was – an ignoramus old fool who would take pity on her "but I’m just a silly little girl" act and let her off the hook with no penalty?
It was convenient to blame her long time publicist Elliott Mintz, who tried hard to convince all and sundry that he was the bad guy, and freely subjected himself to be Hilton’s fall guy. Here was a man who didn’t seem to mind that Hilton was more infamous than famous, whose fickle nature saw him fired one day and then rehired the following day, and who was willing to cop the blame for Hilton’s misinformation about her suspended licence. I’m really not sure if I should applaud his complete disregard of having his reputation dragged through mud, or slap him over the head for it.
Even the Governator won’t be able to save you now. Firstly, the Governor has jurisdiction only in felony cases, not misdemeanours like Hilton’s case, and only after time has been served. And secondly, pardons don’t generally keep people out of jail – they’re used after the fact to expunge the criminal record to allow the offender to get a job, vote and other things non-felons can do. To top it all off, the Governor would only act on cases with extraordinary and extenuating circumstances, and I hardly call the actions of this noxious slapper extenuating.
Here are two clues, Hilton, and I’m going to give them to you free of charge.
* None of this would have happened if you had just obeyed the law and not driven your car for a few months. Your licence was suspended for 4 months, not 4 years. Did you really feel the burning need to hop back behind the wheel of a car during this time? It’s not like you can’t afford a chauffeur to take you anywhere you please.
* The judge might have been a bit more lenient if you had arrived to the Court hearing on time.
I take my hat off to Judge Sauer. He has finally shown us that no matter how famous or powerful one might be (or deemed to be), breaking the law actually means jail time.
How can this contemptuous snippet of a tramp ever be taken seriously by the general population if she won’t take herself seriously?
Take ownership of your life, Hilton, and stop blaming everyone else for your wrongdoings. You’re 26, not 6, so stop acting your shoe size and start acting your age. And here’s another freebie, Hilton – you do the crime, you do the time. Drink driving is a crime. At best, the "time" for this crime is licence suspension. Driving with a suspended licence is also a crime. At best, the "time" for this crime are fines and / or jail time. You could have hurt someone with that big fancy car of yours, or worse yet, you could have killed someone with it. So, at worst, the "time" for both of these crimes is a life sentence of shouldering the knowledge that you took a life from this earth, when you should have stayed off the roads.
Do the time, Hilton. Suck it up like an adult and do the time. And for crying out loud, use the time wisely to reflect on what you are not doing with your life. And grow up.
After all that’s said and done, I for one am looking forward to Hilton-free media coverage for 45 days.